


YouTube AU: Wisdom Teeth Removal **GONE WRONG**

by softcalender



Series: YouTube AU [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anesthesia, Fluff, Funny, Humor, I Made Myself Cry, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Volleyball Dorks in Love, Wisdom Teeth, high, this is so funny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:21:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25816474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softcalender/pseuds/softcalender
Summary: Kageyama has to get his wisdom teeth removed. Tsukishima films. It is, in a word, chaos.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Kageyama Tobio & Tsukishima Kei & Yachi Hitoka & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Hinata Shouyou/Yachi Hitoka, Kageyama Tobio/Tsukishima Kei
Series: YouTube AU [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1822618
Comments: 34
Kudos: 362





	YouTube AU: Wisdom Teeth Removal **GONE WRONG**

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tokeiimi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tokeiimi/gifts), [kageyawas (babiekags)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/babiekags/gifts).



> AHAHAH shoutout to tokeimi for sending me this prompt i have been thinking about this non-stop so I just had to write it.

> TITLE: Wisdom Teeth Removal **GONE WRONG**

_The camera is seemingly put on the dashboard of a car. Kageyama is in the driving seat with Tsukishima next to him. Behind them Yachi and Hinata are looking at their phones and inaudibly conversing._

"Hey guys. Welcome back to my channel! I have become practically a vlog channel because today isn't a sporting video either," _the screen freezes on his despondent expression and sad violin plays._

_Jump Cut._

"We are going to the teeth doctor right now."

_Yachi and Hinata, now listening, start to giggle._

"The teeth doctor." _Kei repeats, unimpressed._

"Yes," _Tobio laughs,_ "the dentist."

"King, you don't even need the drugs to mess up your words." _Kei teased._

"Shut up." _Kageyama playfully scowled at him and hit Kei's thigh. His hand stayed there. He turned to the camera intending to continue. One hand on the stirring wheel._

"I think he will cry." _Hinata pipped from the back._

"I think he will be very loud." _Yachi mused._

"A loud crier?"

"I meant in general but probably yeah."

_Kageyama was annoyed._

"DO YOU GUYS WANNA TAKEOVER MY VIDEO THEN OR CAN I SPEAAK."

_Jump Cut. They are parked in a lot._

"I don't know why all these people are here. Tsukishima, my boyfriend, is here to drive me home after I get my wisdom teeth, top and bottom ones, removed. And Hinata and Yachi are my close friends who for some reason want to see me right after this surgery."

 _Tsukishima deviously leans into the camera,_ "Can you believe this idiot intended to drive home by HIMSELF after the procedure!"

_In the back Yachi and Hinata cackle loudly as a whiny Kageyama asks them why they are being so mean to them. A caption appears on the right corner of the screen._

> _~Kei Editing Here~_
> 
> _NOTE: Kageyama does NOT know the effects of anaesthesia._

"I have had some sinus pain for a while now and I put of going to the dentist to remove my wisdom teeth because of the virus. But it's gotten quite bad that some nights I can't sleep."

"It's about f(BLEEP) time. He complains so much too me!" Hinata said.

 _Kageyama looked torn trying to yell at him. Cause on one hand he knew that Hinata was 100% right._ _He settled on yelling at him not to swear._ "With the annoncement of phase 3 it seems safe to book an appointment so I did and here we are."

_Jump cut. They were now inside a white clinic. Kageyama is holding camera and panning between his three friends._

"Alright, see you guys in an hour. Take care of me."

_All in unison shook their heads no. Jump Cut. The camera is angled at Tsukishima's feet as he walks into a room. A caption appears on screen._

> _One hour later._

_The camera settles on Tobio as he asks the doctor about the anaesthetic, "If I didn't finish that can we take that to go?"_

_Tsukishima, Hinata and Yachi burst out laughing._

"How do you feel Tobio?" _Yachi asked._

_Kageyama started to act possessed. His body shook vigorously as if he was having a seizure, "I feel like I can run a marathon."_

_Tsukishima was almost worried but the doctor was laughing, "_ I want a nascar."

_Jump Cut._

_Kageyama was not looking at them. Then, he picked his nose then flicked it at the camera._

"Tobio stop," _Kei was drawling between heavy breathes. Uncontrollable laughter spilling anyway_. "Tobio-"

"Yeah, thats my name." _Tobio said plainly. He paused for a moment then lunged at the camera holding Kei. The camera presses against Kageyama's shoulder as he interrogates his boyfriend._

"Are you with someone? You are so handsome. I love you."

_Hinata was dying in the background, Yachi was in tears. Tsukishima calmly answered._

"I am with someone."

 _Kageyama flung back like he was shot with a howling cry. Then he mumbled, in an awkward position on the black dentist chair,_ "Not fair."

"I am with you actually." _In the corner of the video a caption appears_

> _*sadly_

_Kageyama looked at him confused before smiling so hard it looked like it hurt especially with his swollen mouth. Jump Cut_

_Hinata was fiddling with his bag as Kageyama started to babble again._

"I don't have tongue anymore."

"It's there." _Hinata said._

"No, you put it in the bag." _Behind the camera Kei wheezed._

"Fine, then at home you can put it back on then." _Hinata argued._

 _There is a pause as Tobio thinks very hard. Then he very practically says_ , "But I don't have the tools!"

"I do, I promise that I will put it back." _Yachi quickly resolves._

"... You better."

_Jump cut._

_Kageyama is yelling something incomprehensible as Yachi and Hinata try to restrain him,_ "You can't tell me what to do! Let me do a cartwheel!" 

_His voice is slurred due to the gauzes in his mouth. Desperately, their friends try to soothe him._

"You have got to be quiet." _Kei said._

"Why, who's sleeping?" _Tobio replied. Instantly stilling._

"So erratic." _Kei mumbled into the camera._

"Is there a baby here? I want to pet them."

 _Hinata all but screamed,_ "YOU CAN'T PET BABIES."

_Jump Cut._

_Hinata and Yachi were now sitting down in the corner of the room. They are trying to decide which videos to put on their instagram stories of Kageyama acting like a fool. The room was fairly quiet. Tsukishima stood in front of Kageyama with the camera. He panned to their lower half. Tsukishima had Kageyama's legs restrained and clasped within his. Suddenly, Tobio starts to remove the gauze from inside his mouth. He stares dead at the camera/Kei as he does it._

_"_ Leave in the gauze, Tobio."

_Trepidation seeps into Kei's voice._

"No." _Kageyama chucks it at Kei who disgusted jumps away._

_Jump cut._

"Let me put it back inside." Kageyama says.

"It was on the floor."

"Five-second rule."

"The doctor needs to give you new ones. Those are now dirty."

"Fine thirty second rule!"

_Jump cut._

"Should I do a backflip?"

"No."

_Jump cut._

"I can't feel nothing."

"Then go to sleep."

"But then I will miss the match."

_Kei turns the camera to his confused face and mouths, 'There is no match."_

_Jump cut._

_A nurse in the background comes in and faintly asks about Tobio's schedule._

"My schedule?" _Tobio repeats. Dazed._

"Yes, the doctor wants you back for a check up in-"

"You wish I came back."

 _Yachi piped from her seat,_ "Kageyama you are gay."

"Oh, right."

_Jump cut_

_Hinata is holding the camera at Yachi. She does a peace sign t_ _hen adds,_ "We are allowed to leave now. They said the drugs will subside in a while."

_In the background, there is some clamour and Hinata turns the camera to Tsukishima practically draping Kageyama over himself._

"I don't need help," _Kei tightens his arm around him,_ "what are you doing?"

"Let's get you home, King."

_Kageyama tries to kiss him. Tsukishima tries to veer away._

"Why won't you kiss me?" _Kageyama looks heartbroken. Yachi is giddily recording with her own phone on Kageyama's right._

"I will kiss you all you like in the car. Let's go?"

"Don't you love me?"

"Good God give me strength." _Kei mutters passing Hinata with the camera._

_Jump cut._

_Kageyama is being practically dragged to the car by Tsukishima and Yachi. Suddenly Tobio starts stripping, "_ I don't need a shirt."

"TOBIO NO."

_Jump cut._

_Tobio all but flops onto the backseat,_ "Don't throw me in the back Hinata-boke"

 _Behind the camera Hinata angrily yells,_ "You did that yourself!"

 _Dazed Kageyama sits up trying to leave the car again. Kei blocks him_ , "Wear your seatbelt."

"Don't tell me what to do Kei!" _Irritatedly he slouches in his seat. Pensively brooding._

 _He pauses his face clears and he says,_ "That was aggressive. I love you Kei. I love you Yachi. I love you Hinata."

 _Yachi says kindly_ , "We love you too. Now put on your seatbelt."

_For some reason Kageyama was entranced by Yachi's white reverse sequin shirt just then. He reached out and stroked her shirt and the sequins switched from black to gold. However that also means that he, a whole gay, was stroking Yachi's boobs. Tsukishima is distraught. Yachi is laughing in surprise. The camera shakes as if an earthquake was happening as Hinata barges forward to swipe his best friend's hand from his girlfriend's chest._

"I WILL KILL YOU."

_Jump cut. They are inside the car and the camera is on the dashboard. Yachi is safety in the drivers seat and a Hinata next to her looking off-put. Tsukishima sits next to his idiot boyfriend. The camera is zoomed in a little so it's focused on the two of them behind._

"Lets take a selfie before we leave?" _Yachi asks._

_As they take the selfie, Kageyama falls asleep._

_Jump cut._

"I WANT MILK."

_Jump cut._

"Am I even a good player?"

"Yes, you are." _Hinata says rolling his eyes._

"Thank you. I appreciate your kindness."

_Jump cut._

"WAIT YACHI WHO LET YOU DRIVE MY CAR."

"YOU DID."

"OH."

_Jump cut._

"These are my eight million dollar grills," _he says this holding his bloody gauzes to the camera. Everyone in shot is looking thoroughly disgusted and Tsukishima gently draws him back to his seat. Distracting him like he was a child with his smart phone._

_Jump cut. Kageyama has put his gauzes back in. He is staring at a selfie he took of himself._

"Did I get lip injections today?"

"Why?"

"They are ginormous."

_Jump cut._

_Kageyama is crying,_ "I ate too many pork buns and now I have big fat cheeks."

"You have small cheeks." _Kei assured him._

"Shut up you liar," _Kei is frankly speechless. Hinata and Yachi are laughing so hard they are crying._

"I told you he would cry," _Hinata says_

_Jump cut. They are parked in a basement. The camera is trailed at the car door, Kageyama is stumbling out with Tsukishima's help, whilst talking on facetime._

"I LOVE you Yamaguchi. Your serves are like phewsh and pow!"

 _Through the phone Yamaguchi laughs,_ "Thank you, Tobio. Gets some rest, okay?"

"So cruel. You didn't say, I love you too."

 _Tadashi stuttered,_ "Well I-"

_Kageyama cut the call._

_Next to him Tsukishima is bewildered but laughing,_ "You didn't let him reply!"

_Tobio was already zoning out and staring in the distance._

_Jump cut. They are inside the house. Tobio is snuggled in their white bed, already half asleep._

"Oh I farted.

"Happens."

_Jump Cut. Kageyama is peacefully resting now._

"Do you wanna do the outro?" _Kei whispers._

 _Without opening his eyes Kageyama slurs._ "Like, comment, subscribe and don't let the bed bugs bite."

_He passes out._

_Tsukishima walks away laughing and informs the camera,_ "I think he is gonna be out of it the whole day so I am going to edit this video. If you guys wanna see a reaction video comment below! See ya."

_Blank screen. The outro music plays._

_A bubble appeared linking Kei's channel on the left on the right a link to Kageyama's plant tour video appears._

* * *

5,067 Comments

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**bluebirdstar:**

**GHFJDKSL THIS WAS COMEDY GOLD**

**Fulanchi:**

**no one: *** **Kageyama driving with one hand and holding Kei's thigh with the other***

**me: 💦 💦 💦**

**keifantom:**

**Kageyama forgetting he is dating Tsukishima is too good. WHAT DID THEY GIVE HIM.**

**settingstrike:**

**it was like -578493 degree celsius🤣🤣 why the FUCK did Kageyama wanna strip omg**

**KageyamaTobioIsMyPlantDad:**

**favourite quotes from this video-**

**1\. "teeth doctor" (this is before the drugs but also he isnt WRONG though)**

**2\. "Take care of me" *all of them shake their heads no"**

**3\. "Are you with someone? You are so handsome. I love you."**

**4\. the whole "I don't have tongue anymore." scene.**

**5\. "thirty second rule!"**

**6.** **"Should I do a backflip?" "No."**

**7\. "YOU CAN'T PET BABIES."**

**8\. "Good God give me strength."**

**add your favourites!**

**kagetsukki:**

**"I WANT MILK."**

**Milkmaid67:**

**"That was** **aggressive, I love you all. " my heart warmed**

**Humedi:**

**are we not going to talk about kageyama stroking yachi's chest or-**


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